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Secret to successful relationships

When the topic of life goals is spoken about, one of the most common answer you will find is the desire to find the perfect partner that you can settle down with and have a family. Often enough you are able to find that partner that you relate to, that supports you and whom you call you your better half but what exactly happens after the initial attraction between you fades. Once a relationship has passed that stage and you start to fall into a routine, to sustain the relationship, there is a lot of work and effort needed. So, what exactly is it that couples do correctly to ensure a successful relationship? 

As cliché, as it may sound one of the most important aspects of a relationship, is communication. To be able to create and maintain a healthy relationship it is important that you and your partner have an understanding between both of you and that is only possible if you have a good bond with each other and regularly communicate. If often happens that while initially getting to know each other this happens often but as the relationship progresses the only important information gets passed on.   To be able to maintain that level of intimacy between both of you it is important to feel like you know each other well and to be constantly learning about your partner which can only be done through frequent chats. 

Another reason why communication is considered key in a relationship is because it helps develop trust between both the partners so that they feel comfortable enough to share things going on in their life, may they be good or bad. Trust is another key component of a relationship when looking for a partner you often look for someone with whom you can spend your entire life and in order to do that,  to be comfortable to show a vulnerable side of yourself or to be shown that side having complete trust in that person is very important. 

Some relationships often have trouble once there is a routine that has set in. The couple may get stuck in this routine and that rush that was present at the start of the relationship may start to fade away. To renew and spice up things bringing in some novelty or simple romantic gestures might be helpful. Starting new things like a date night, exploring new hobbies like dancing or getting away for a weekend together could help bring you closer while also learning new skills or exploring fun destinations. 

Usually, people express unhappiness within a relationship after there has been a fight that has extended more than it should have or a previous disagreement that was not resolved properly is causing problems again. This is why conflict resolution between couples in a proper way is of utmost importance. The first and most important thing to keep in mind is that you should always talk out the problem no matter how big or small it may be. 

Having conflict occasionally is completely healthy however it needs to be resolved in a calm and sensible manner, yelling or blaming each other will not help the relationship and at the same time will hurt your partner’s feeling. Instead of this, it is more sensible to talk about it in a calm and safe environment until a solution that is agreeable to both of you is met upon. It is important to accept responsibility for your actions and accepting your mistake as well so that the other person does not feel cornered and both of you are able to grow from this. Remember, the discussion between both of you has to be open and non-judgemental so that effective progress can be made, and your relationship can flourish. 

Lastly, one practice that both you and your partner can adopt is mindfulness, this is a practice used in both yoga and positive psychology and emphasises on focusing on the positive aspects of our daily lives and really appreciating them. Through this, both you and your partner will be able to better appreciate each other, reciprocate that feeling and therefore increase intimacy, communication and trust between both of you. 

Despite all of these techniques, if you feel that you need additional external support seeing a professional and taking their help is also an option available for both of you.